I have wager in the fires of Brimstone not knowing if I would ever see the sun shine again. I truly believe I was destined to be just another fading shadow crippled into silence in the Basement of Secrets from playing Hyde’s twisted fucking game. Many times I pray just to be put outta my agonizing existence ,but where is the fun in that right…You sick fucking Suka, God forbid Mommy dearest would retract her claws from my flesh.
SUFFOCATED INTO SILENCE OR SAY FUCK THAT
Being a nine year old lad ” You never thought you would see Hell surround you blanketing out your innocents ripping your wings from you so you couldn’t fly away and try to soar.
Being beaten into submission wanting me to fear the dark but it became apart of me embraced , molded me into the sword “each time I was perscuted into inferno of dismay I would not submit over and over again trying to break me. As I became more defiant not give them reaction they wanted” things would amped with more twisted mortifying violent intensity. I had mention before when I try desperately be exile from the belly of fire I was mocked and laugh at…told to stop telling stories ” You know how crushing that was like my lungs every time I took a breath oxygen was be viced outta me. I was so depleted praying for death to come and fucking take me.
But that would be too easy there is no way Mommy fucking dearest would let me be extinguished. From serving a useful purpose to that sick, sadistic monstrosity Hyde. But something inside of me knew if I was going to survived and fight for my life it would be ME and ME alone each time I would resist and fight back things would get even more intense .Something I heard somewhere at the time I didn’t know where I heard it. Told me that you already in hell keep going ! So I did , I also knew to survived I couldn’t try to think of happy place because reality the pain and welts along with bruises would still be there to remind me this was fucking real and there was no physically escaping from my depicted reality of brutality.
“KNOWING IF I AM GOING TO RISE ABOVE IT …Would BECAUSE OF ME”
Being isolated cut off to life jacket but having constant mockery of being shown means of escape only to show my life wasn’t in my hands. Or so I thought but no matter excruciating the brutality and violence I could not will not ever fucking give up.
If You anyone suffocating in silence don’t let them feel empty and alone. Being on the Constant Roller Coaster that is relentless and unforgiving can be as if your standing in a continous state of quicksand.
YOU MATTER & SO DO I